friendship

Some of My Best Friends Are Worship Leaders

Frank

A good friend of mine got married last weekend. At his groom honoring, his best man showed a video slideshow of some of his favorite memories with this brother. Based on the pictures, the groom looked like a pretty fun guy.

Of course I already knew this- he was a worship leader.

I wasn’t in any of the pictures. The narcissist in me always feels insecure at times like these- doubting the depth and value of our friendship- but the reality was that I lived an hour and a half away. As I was watching his pictures- fooling around with mixed martial arts, out on the shooting range, cooking dinner with his buds- I was content to admit that that’s just not me. Does that make me less of a friend? Of course not! But the context of our friendship is different. While the friends in these pictures stood beside him on his wedding day, I was behind the scenes as his wedding coordinator. (I need to be reminded sometimes that I “have the gift of administration” and I fail badly when I try and be something I’m not)

There are different kinds of friends: the goof-offs, the memory-makers, the initiators, the deep all-night talkers; then there are the rocks, those friends who will always be there in any time and any circumstance. I’m embarrassed not to be the former, but I recognize the need for the latter.

When I got married, I told my wife that I was like a faithful old dog- she won’t be able to get rid of me, I’ll follow wherever she goes, and I smell and drool. I think I’m pretty boring; she tells me she was attracted to me because I’m interesting. My daughter thinks I’m funny. I think both are lying to make me feel better (just kidding, I just struggle to see myself that way).

So some of my best friends are worship leaders. I need those friends- the outgoing, the flamboyant, the risk-takers. At the same time they need me- the introvert, the faithful, the reliable.

How would you describe your style of friendship?
Are you comfortable in that role?

It’s Not About Me

Frank

Not long ago I entered a contest that relied on people voting for my blog- whoever got the most votes would win. Well I voted for myself, I think my wife voted for me, and that was probably just about it. I’ve never been very good at self promotion. There are blogs that specialize on having successful blogs: how to generate traffic, how to encourage return visits, how to write catchy titles, how to maximize SEO, and on and on. I’m sure if I put out the effort, I might actually get good at this thing. But that just isn’t my style. That, and I’m a little bit lazy. I admit I check my site visits and feel slightly insecure when I think I write my best post ever and it doesn’t take off like I think it should. I get mad at Stumbled Upon when it crashes and my scheduled posts don’t go up (like last week). I get frustrated that my work firewall forces this blog to be a habit that I can really only dedicate an hour or two a day towards.

But none of that really matters. When I first started this blog I was motivated by a couple of observations. One, I saw that many in my fellowship of churches had isolated themselves on a spiritual island and two, that mainstream Christianity seemed to be more about politics and consumerism than about Christ. So I set out blogging to address each of these: by sharing to the brothers and sisters in my fellowship what I was reading/learning from mainstream Christianity and sharing my personal studies and convictions to those outside of my personal fellowship. I wasn’t expecting to change the world, but I was hoping that I could at least set the bar a little higher for each of us in our walk with Jesus. And even if no one else read a word, it was healthy for me to express the many thoughts in my head and convictions in my heart.

That was six years ago. A year ago things were serendipitous for a big blogiversary bash: five years is a nice round number, I was at roughly 500 posts, and I was just shy of 500 followers on Twitter. But I couldn’t shake making it all about me and I ended up doing nothing.

So here I am celebrating six years. Six, in biblical numerology, is less than perfection. I think that’s appropriate.

In those six years, I have met some great friends online. Brothers and sisters who have encouraged me, taught me, and humored me. I’ve also won a lot of swag- books, CDs, virtual conference registrations, and so on. So here’s my chance to give back.

A couple of months ago I created a Facebook page for this blog. At the time I wanted it to act like a message board to talk about my blog posts and pretty much whatever else came to mind. More importantly, I wanted to use it as a “portal” so to speak where I (and really anyone else who wanted to) could share news, articles, blogs, prayer requests and so on that encourage each of us to live a life of “Public Christianity”. Since then some of my friends have liked that page, but I have only received one like coming directly from my blog.

So here’s the deal: between now and Friday, if you like my Facebook page you will be entered into a drawing. (And not to keep out all 11 of you who have liked the page so far, you’ll be entered twice!) Because I’m an avid reader, of course I’ll be giving away books. I’m also a little bit of a small-group nerd, so there might be some small group material mixed in as well. And these won’t just be any books- I have been encouraged to see many of my blogging buddies get published in the past year or so and this is my chance to spread the word.

You don’t have to comment. Don’t have to tweet. Just like my Facebook page. It’s that easy.

And thank you all for six blessed years.

Who Shapes You?

Frank

Continuing our discussion on Michael Spencer’s Mere Churchianity with Glynn Young and Nancy Rosback. Melissa at In Silence, Humming Softly has also joined the discussion so be sure to check out her thoughts as well. This week we’re on Chapter 17, the penultimate chapter of the book. You can check out Glynn’s thoughts here and Nancy’s here.

This is it, this is the home stretch. Only one chapter to go. For the past 16 chapters of Mere Churchianity, Michael Spencer has described symptom after symptom of what is wrong with the Church in America today. Now we’re getting into the nitty-gritty of what to do about it. I’ve been worried while going through this book by an undercurrent of go-at-it-alone Christianity since the target audience are those who have left the Church physically or spiritually. I’m grateful for this chapter to put those worries to rest. In this chapter, Michael gives a simple description of what Jesus-shaped spirituality is: it is personal and communal, it is mentored, it is saturated in the Scriptures, it grows in the context of service and the Gospel, it is found in relationships.

As I was reading through this chapter and pondering what to write about this week, I couldn’t help but think of those in my life who have shaped my spirituality (hopefully to some degree to be Jesus-shaped). I felt it appropriate to lift them up before the Lord in thanksgiving. Most of these names will not likely mean anything to you, but that’s ok. Some are heroes in the faith. Others are brothers and sisters I fought beside through different spiritual battles. Still others are those whose subtle influence have directed my spiritual course. Off the top of my head, I’m certain this isn’t an exhaustive list. Collectively, they have brought me to where I am today.

Obviously my family, especially my dad and grandpa for their tired service to the church, my sister’s example of “live to serve”, my mom’s patience, and my grandma for being the most loving person I’ve ever known. Fr. Bauer, Mike and Matt, Justin and Bart, Ryan and Kevin, Fr. Roger and Fr. Carl, Joe, Rob, Matt, Jesus, Justin (again, just at a different stage in life) and Justin, Jeff, Jeremy and Paul, David, Jim(!), Steve, John, Flavian, Roel, Rama, Brandon, Sam, Brent, Rob, Steve, Wes, Amy, Alyson, Glenn, Tim, Morris, Shawn, Josh, Bob, Fred, Steve, Neil, Luke, Dave, Jon, Todd, Lathan, Chris, Lorenzo, Marion and Tommy, Fred, Ivan, Kenny, Fabian, Glynn, Jay, Duane, Kevin, Bridget, Ryan, Dusty, Peter, Michael, Jason, and of course, my wife.

My spirituality would look differently if not for these people inspiring me, challenging me, and/or simply befriending me. I could not have ever had a relationship with Jesus alone. I cannot continue to have a relationship with Jesus on my own. These friends, family, and brothers and sisters in Christ have helped me to “Follow Jesus in the Life I Have”.